Are you curious about entering the uncharted territory of anal sex? Do you have a sense of nervousness, yet excitement at the same time? Anal sex can be one of the most pleasurable and sensual sexual experiences for both him and her. Anal play isn’t for everyone but it is for a lot of us! Anal play requires a little preparation….so let’s talk about easing into anal!
Don’t do it if you don’t want to. Anal play is most pleasurable if you are relaxed and accepting. If you aren’t into it, your body is definitely not going to be on board and it could end up being painful.
Start slow. Before going into full fledged anal, hard pounding anal sex, start with anal play. This will get your body used to the sensation and let you know what to expect. Start with fingers and move up to beads and plugs. When you are comfortable there, move on to penetration.
Beyond fingers and penis’s, do not insert anything anally that isn’t designed for that purpose. Unlike the vagina, the rectum is physically longer and creates a bit of suction. As a result, you may have an item “get stuck”, for lack of a better term. Use only toys that are designed for anal and have a flared base. Do not insert bullets or eggs that are not attached to a control for easy removal.
Be sure to clean all of your toys properly after using. Always disinfect them as per the manufacturers instructions and store them properly to ensure the toys are in good working order. Tears of breakdown in the toy can be difficult to clean and can cause bacteria to grow. Also, never engage in anal sex and then vaginal penetration after. This can cause vaginal infections.
Safety is important when trying or engaging in anal sex. Even if it isn’t rough, anal sex can cause small tears in the lining of the rectum. This makes you more susceptible to infections and STI’s. In addition to using a lot of lube, using a barrier like a condom, will minimize this risk.
Lube…..LOTS OF LUBE. Unlike the vagina, this area is not self-lubricating. Not only will it not be enjoyable, it can be downright painful and risk injury if you aren’t using enough lubrication. All lubes are not created equal. (We will go more in depth in another blog on this). Water based lubes will reabsorb into the body, as we are made of mostly water. Because of this. They will need to be reapplied. Silicone lubes may work well but are a pain to clean up. Placing a towel on the bed or a mattress cover can help with cleanup. Specialized anal lubes are generally the lube of choice for anal play.
If it hurts STOP…(unless that is the goal, no judgments here). Pain is an indicator that something is not right. Stop, take a breather, relax and try again or try another time. Just because it hurt once does not mean you won’t enjoy anal sex another time.
Just let him put the tip in! Ladies, we have all heard this a time or two but with anal sex, it is on point. The head of the penis is the widest part and if it is going to hurt, this is usually when it happens. Once the head is in it should be smooth sailing.
Anal sex is not just enjoyable for females. In fact, it may be more pleasurable for men. Men have something us ladies don’t….a prostate. Prostate stimulation is incredibly pleasurable for men and can lead to intense orgasms. To find the prostate, insert a lubed finger and reach upward, towards his stomach, a few inches in, similar to the “come hither” motion when looking for the g spot. Once he becomes more comfortable, try using a prostate massage